Remember the old saying Honesty is the best policy? This doesn’t just mean being honest with others, but also with yourself. When we start getting real with ourselves, we start to cut ourselves some slack. This doesn’t mean we go through life half-ass. It just means we put true priorities first and live a truly great life.
Ever heard yourself say…
I’ll be happy once I’ve lost another 10lbs. I’ll be happy once I find someone to love me. Being thin makes me happy. Once I find that job I’ll be happy. When I move to that town I’ll be happy.
Unfortunately, you won’t be happier after you’ve lost 10lbs. You will only replace that stress of feeling 10lbs too heavy with fear of gaining 10lbs. Stop lying to yourself. You won’t be happy once you’ve found someone to love you. Unless you love yourself you will never feel truly loved. Be honest with yourself on what is the real issue. Once you determine whatever it is (exa. I don’t love myself or I don’t believe I deserve to be loved) you have just then planted the seed of challenge.
Similar to when you are car shopping and find one that you are going to buy you begin to see that car everywhere. Is it that all of a sudden everyone has the same car as you or is it that by simply acknowledging the car you have become more aware of it? My guess is it’s the latter, but that I’ll leave up to you. Same will occur when you have planted the seed of challenging any unhealthy thoughts or patterns. You’ll begin to recognize it as an unhealthy habit or thought each time it comes up allowing you the opportunity to challenge it and possibly even change the thought to a healthy one. Simply by talking back to it, not even necessarily acting on it, you will be creating a change (I’m not horrible for eating that cookie and I do love myself or I deserve love just as any other living entity simply because).
It wasn’t until I got real honest with myself that I realized how much I’d been lying to myself. This inevitably putting an insane amount pressure on myself. I had created this image that I was doing better with food (and ultimately life) than I was to cover up for my lack of progress. I wanted everyone (including myself) to believe I was doing so well and that I was perfect. When I acknowledged this false image I was able to challenge the thoughts and find other areas in my life that were being ruled by this misconception.
By simply acknowledging this thought, great things started to happen. I began to better hear myself think unhealthy thoughts. And knowing it was unhealthy, I began to challenge it and change that thought. Even if I followed through with the unhealthy thought, the seed had been planted and there was no way I could avoid it. I had still changed the pattern because I had challenged it.
Slowly I reprogrammed my brain to no longer act on the unhealthy habits and even substituted many of them for the thoughts I did believed (I’m not fat if I don’t work out, I’m not defined by my achievements or what I have/can or haven’t/can’t do, Food is nourishment not punishment etc.).
By being honest with myself I relieved the feeling of perfection and have changed my life for the better. I still have a ways to go in my soul searching journey, but the honesty has allowed the journey to really pick up. Great things are starting to happen.
Are you being honest with yourself?
Tell me about you.
Be gentle. Be kind. Be loving to you.